What To Do When your kid does not want to go to school

Sometimes kids give up on something due to various reasons. But when it comes to school a parent must try to find out why your kid has lost sudden interest and what to do to solve the problem. Kids can begin to complain of stomach ache right before going to school and immediately the kid is allowed to stay at home the symptoms vanish only to reappear in the morning. If your child is exhibiting this character, it may be due to anxiety or other issues which he or she is coping with. It is possible that your kid may be suffering from school refusal and this is just caused by anxiety or lack of interest in school at all or just laziness too. In this situation, the kid is well behaved but does not follow the parent’s instruction to go to school and prefers sitting at home. Parents can spend hours and energy trying to convince the kid to go to school but end up unsuccessful. Here are some you could take to remedy the situation:

1. Check your child for physical causes

When your kid starts to develop symptoms of stomach ache or fever make sure to take him or her to the physician. It is unlikely that anything happened to your kid physically but it is good to clear out any assumption. You might never know but you will be sorry to find out you are wrong later so it is best to clear your doubts.

2. Talk with your child

Create that me-and-you time with your kid. Talk about what is bothering her and while at the same time talk about the plan of going back to school. Do not forget that kids can find it hard to express themselves and sometimes they might not be able to explain what they are feeling. The most important message to send is to let them know that they have the power to overcome whatever it is that they are going through

3. Don’t lecture

Avoid lengthy discussions and debates about the importance of going to school. Those things do no good and may actually make the matter worse. It may make your kid hold back and feel that he or she is being judged and therefore is unable to help themselves.

4. Play detective

Try to monitor your kid’s time of falling ill. Monitor the pattern with which the sickness attacks him and the manner in which it comes. When doing this, make sure that they do not notice that you are monitoring them. Just do this on low-key and take mental note or can jot these things down. Also, try to look for clues as to what is causing your child to avoid school.

5. Set up a conference

Both parents should meet with the teacher and the school counselor if possible. Make them aware of the situation so that they will avoid anything that will make your kid run away from school.

6. Keep an open mind

Do not always try to put blame on the teacher or school first. In the same vein, teachers ought not to assume that parents are at fault here too. When stress levels rise, it is natural for people to try and blame each other but this does not solve the problem. Work with the school authorities to find out if there are other factors like bullying which is causing the child stress. The school authority will be able to help in this case and ensure that the matter is addressed.

7. Do not make it nice to stay at home

Let your child know that if he is truly ill, he will need to see a doctor or stay in bed and rest. Make sure to keep the television off and other gadgets too. Make it a rule that no TV or video games during sick days. This will probably sound so obvious but kids these days stay home sick but have complete control to do whatever they like at home. Always try to avoid showing him or her extra attention and sympathy. It may sound harsh but it is one of the things that make them feel that they can get away with it easily.

8. Make your home a learning environment

If your kid decides to stay at home and is not ill, then this is an opportunity to turn your home into a teaching center for him. You can have him read, sit upright at a desk or write. For those kids that are at their adolescence’s, you make sure that you ban sleeping during the day as this is quite appealing to kids at that age. It may seem quite hard for working parents to follow but you can try to do your best. You could suggest these steps to a nonworking friend or neighbor that your kid stays with while you are at work.

9. Make a sick policy ahead of time

Make it clear that you do not like sickness and that school is very important unless you are really sick and specify the type of sickness that can lead to no school day. For example, you can lay the rule that unless your child has a fever, she goes to school. The sickness must be evaluated by a nurse or doctor. If the doctor sees nothing, do not waste much time discussing physical symptoms, especially if the doctor has already determined there is nothing medically wrong.

10. Seek support

Think of having someone else take your child until the situation is resolved. This is good at times, especially if you are so emotionally affected by the situation. You might find it hard to do what is necessary due to your cloud of judgement.

11. Constructive feedback

Give children the chance to express their feelings, needs and thoughts and ideas. It is important that you have a direct communication with your child. By chatting them up, you can identify the problem and tackle the matter from an informed point of view.

12. Motivate them

Self-esteem is very important to ensure that your kid is able to have confidence in themselves. Kids may not believe that school is for them or feel that they don’t belong. You need to motivate them and tell them the reasons why they need school. Keep telling them that they can do it and that they are just like any other person and if they can, then they too can do same.

13. Avoid arguing

This does not help at all:, you cannot be an in charge parent when you are arguing with your child. Learn to control your emotion and even when you are frustrated or angry, keep calm and avoid any immature and destructive situation.

Although it’s unsettling to see your child intensely distressed about attending school, try to remain calm and supportive, but ultimately firm. Remember, your child needs to go to school – this is where children mature, not only intellectually but also socially and emotionally. By following the above suggestions, there’s every reason to believe that your child will overcome his school anxiety and, in the process, gain a newfound appreciation of his ability to hang in there and work through a tough situation.

Avoiding going to school is not an issue that can be ignored; it is something that needs to be tackled head on to avoid any long-term issues.

Most children will have a lack of motivation toward school following the school holidays, but having strategies in place that are encouraging and positive will help your child get back into a routine and enjoying school.