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Every parent will feel terrible when they get a call from the school principal telling them that their child has just been bullied. So many things run through that parent’s mind at the time. But what about a case where their child is the bully? Knowing that your kid has the potential to make another child feel terrible and derives pleasure from doing that can be heartbreaking for most parents. Some parents, most times, don’t even believe that their kids are capable of such. But living in self-denial is not the way to go. It's paramount that you do something about this as soon as you can. Experts have made it clear that bullying has a psychological background. Dr. Lamia is a clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst who has spent 35 years teaching adults, adolescents, and preteens about dealing with behavior and emotion. She explains that bullying is one of the most damaging childhood problems and that bullying can lead victims to actions as extreme as suicide or to permanent psychological damage. “Bullying is a very serious issue, and parents/educators need to understand the dynamics and be prepared to help their kids in case they become either a perpetrator or victim of bullying. The first step in dealing with bullying is understanding the psychology of the bully and the motivation for their actions. Knowing what’s behind bullying behavior can help you be more effective in dealing with bullies.”, said Dr. Lamia. One of the major misconceptions about bullying is that bullies feel bad about themselves and this is the reason why they hurt others. The prevailing belief is that deep down they feel so insecure or ashamed of themselves, and this negativity seeks an outlet in hurting others. In Dr. Lamia’s exploration of bullying, she’s found that generally speaking, that’s not how bullies operate.  If they do feel bad about themselves they are not aware of it. Attacking others actually enables bullies to be unaware of what they really feel. They have a unique way of making others feel shame and humiliation, which is what they are hiding from themselves. They do this by intuitively recognizing a person’s insecurities and attacking them. Attacking others not only keeps them from looking within themselves, but it also can give them a feeling of excitement or power. Although bullies put down others in order to raise themselves up, they are not aware of how negatively they feel about themselves. Putting down others keeps them from recognizing their need to raise themselves up.  Most of them have deep-rooted feelings of shame that they are unable to address. Now that you know more about bullies and the major reason behind why they actually bully others, let’s get down to what you can do when you find out that your child falls into this category. What to do when you hear that your child just bullied another kid: 1. Find out what really happened Your first natural instinct might be to get angry, but bullying expert Joel [...]

Every good parent’s dream is that their kids should be able to be honest with them majority of the time. It is, however, heartbreaking when you learn that your kids lie to you more often than they tell you the truth. You can’t exactly raise your kids up the right way when they’re mostly lying to you. So the big question is, how exactly do you keep your kids from lying to you? Do you punish them each time they lie or do you shout at them? Read on to learn how to handle such situations but before diving into that, you must also understand some of the reasons why kids lie. 10 Reasons Why Kids Lie to Their Parents 1. Self-Protection The biggest fear in every kid’s life is to be scolded and punished for their mischiefs. This is the reason why kids cook up different types of imaginary stories to save themselves from their parents’ scolding. As they see all doors shut for escaping, they tell a fib. From putting the blame on siblings or pets to forming false excuses for not studying, kids use all these tactics to get away from the anger of their parents. They feel insecure while telling the truth, knowing that it could lead to thrashing and scolding from their parents. Slowly, with time this becomes a habit as they feel safe to take refuge in telling lies. 2. A ‘No’ from Parents Kids often lie for the fear of being denied by parents what they ask for. Sometimes they wish to go for a party or a simple get together at a friend’s place but the previous experience of not getting consent from parents pushes them to cook up lies like they are going for a group study or to take notes from a friend. Kids fail to understand the reason behind the denial and this leads them to take the support of lies. However, if a parent opens up with the child about why he/she is denied to do certain work, there would be no space to keep secrets or tell lies. 3. To Maintain a Good Image Many times, parents compare their children with others and this creates a sense of jealousy as well as despair in the child. In order to be praised and loved by their parents, kids often tend to tell lies to their parents. This could be seen when some of the kids try to tamper with their report card marks or boast about being praised by teachers in the school when they are, on the contrary, often scolded at school. The best way to restrain to a child from doing so is not to nag him/her all the time by comparing with others and try to explore and encourage the hidden talents they might have. 4. Idolization Kids generally start following one or the other celebrity, movie character or even cartoons for that matter and try to take inspiration from the characters they see on [...]

Every parent’s first instinct is to protect their child and to make sure that they’re safe and that all their basic needs are made available. But inasmuch as a parent would always want to be there for their kids, it’s also part of parenting to know when to teach and let your kids do certain things for themselves. This leads to the kids being overly dependent on their parents. It is surprising to know that there are a lot of parents who keep their kids dependent without even knowing what they’re doing or how harmful it is for their kids. This is called overparenting. 7 Signs That You Are Overparenting Your Kids: What is overparenting? This refers to when a parent attempts to micromanage a child’s life. Overparenting usually comes from a parent’s desire to manage their own discomfort as they can’t stand seeing their child get hurt, fail, or make a mistake. At other times, parents feel guilty about disciplining their child and they refuse to enforce consequences. Ongoing hypervigilance and overindulgence can have serious consequences and some of these consequences involve: stunting a child’s development and causing a child to become overly dependent. Here are some warning signs that you’re overparenting your child: 1. You Get Into Power Struggles Over Little Things Frequent power struggles can signal that you’re being too picky or too demanding. If you find yourself arguing with a 5-year-old about eating enough vegetables, or you’re getting into constant battles with your 15-year-old about the way she styles her hair, you may be preventing her from developing the independence she needs. 2. You Struggle to Let Your Child Make His Own Choices Sometimes, it’s easy to assume there’s a “best way” or a “right way” to do everything but that assumption can lead to micromanaging your child's every move. If you can’t let go and allow your child to explore new opportunities—like wearing clothes that don’t match or putting the bathtub on the roof when she’s playing with her dollhouse—it’s likely that you’re overparenting. 3. You Can't Stand to See Your Child Fail Nobody likes watching their child fail, but if you jump in to rescue your child whenever she experiences problems, she won’t learn from her mistakes. If you’re quick to tell her the right answer every time she’s struggling to figure out her homework or you intervene at the first hint of a problem during a play date, your child won’t develop problem-solving skills. Sometimes, kids need to experience failure firsthand. Recovering from failure provides children with opportunities to discover how they can do things differently in the future. 4. You Worry About Many Issues Other Parents Don't Worry About If you’re always the only parent who seems concerned about your 6-year-old playing on the monkey bars at the playground, or you can’t stand the thought of your 13-year-old crossing the street with friends, it can be tempting to assume it's because you’re more caring than the other parents. But before drawing that [...]

Sleep is a very important part of the human life. It has a whole lot of health benefits that we wouldn’t want to dive into right now. On the other hand, not getting enough of it can come with a lot of negative effects on your body and psyche. Scientific research has proven, beyond every reasonable doubt, that kids who go to bed earlier, not only outmatch their colleagues when it comes to academics but also experience improved sports and athletic performance. Here are some of the reasons why your kids might not want to go to bed early: 1. They recently just ate a lot of sugar Sugar has a way of getting kids excited and all spiking them up physically. So one reason why your kid keeps running and up and down the house the when it’s time for them to be in bed might be because they just had some sugar. One way you can deal with this is to make sure you monitor what they eat, especially during the evenings. 2. Your home is still lively If by the time the kids are supposed to be in bed, the television is on or you and your spouse are up, probably having lively conversations or playing games, the kids wouldn’t want to miss out on all that action and so they tend to look for all devious ways to stay up, even after you send them to bed. 3. You’re forcing them to Psychology has established that there’s a certain range of age (that varies from child to child) wherein kids in that age range don’t want to be commanded to do things. So when you try to force them to go to bed at a certain time, they tend to disobey. They might not appear outrightly disobedient, but when you send them up to their room, you go back about 45 minutes later and they’re still up jumping on their bed. It’s not enough that you just know some of the reasons why your kids may not want to go to bed early. You should also learn ways to put this problem to rest. But before you get into that, it is also important that you understand some of the health benefits that come with going to bed on time and waking up early. Science has proven that going to bed early and waking up early can benefit you in these various ways: 1. Helps you better deal with negativity In 2014, a study conducted proved that people who go to bed later are more likely to be drowned with repetitive negative thoughts. A lot of entrepreneurs have made mention about how they take their sleeping time seriously. Your sleeping time increases your problem-solving abilities and keeps you at a better state to handle whatever issues come at you during your day’s activities. 2. Enhances your chances of success “When it comes to business success, morning people hold the important cards. My earlier research showed that [...]

Inasmuch as it has been proven through research that kids that are not socially connected are more prone to isolation and depression, being connected to the wrong social group can be quite detrimental. Having bad friends can lead to risky decision-making, bad behaviors, and poor academic performance. However, finding good friends can be hard for teens who struggle socially, and falling into the wrong crowd is easy. Trying to pull a teen away from these potentially destructive relationships can be like trying to separate two powerful magnets. Once teens find peer acceptance, they don’t want to let it go. They will do whatever it takes to fit in, even if it means going against their parents' wishes. Funnily, in some cases, these teens seem to have nothing in common with their new friends, but desire something different. These teens will often abandon their good friends in search of new and exciting relationships. Adolescence and the tyranny of extremes can truly leave parents in a quandary about what to do next. Long gone are the childhood days of arranging play dates and orchestrating friendships. Teens, as opposed to young children, like to be in the driver's seat. But if the teen is a reckless driver, parents may be left frantically searching for ways to keep the teen on the straight and narrow path. So, what can a parent do? A lot of people would advise that in this case, it is best to let the teenager learn from his or her experience. But how long can a parent sit and just watch her child fade away slowly? So how do you take actions and at the same time not come off as an overbearing nanny to your kids? First, it's important to identify if there is a reason to be concerned about who your child is associating with. These are some signs your child may be hanging with the wrong crowd: 1. Suspicious behavior Teens who are up to no good usually sneak behind their parents' backs and behave suspiciously. 2. Tanking grades Teens who get involved with the wrong crowd often begin to neglect academic responsibilities. Their homework assignments don’t get completed, projects don’t get turned in and they may arrive to class late or even skip classes. 3. Snarky attitude It's certainly not out of character for many teens to roll their eyes, sigh loudly or do other things to show when they're annoyed. But add a group of snarky teens to the mix, and the result can be a back-talking disrespectful tirade. 4. Avoiding interests and hobbies When teens hang out with peers who are a poor influence, they tend to withdraw from what they once enjoyed doing. They become more interested in impressing their new friends and doing the things their friends like instead. 5. Dissing old friends Teens who find a new peer group tend to neglect old friends in favor of the new and may jeopardize positive relationships. Of course, if you determine your teen [...]

Because we live in a world of technology, our children are taught to use computers at a very early age. This has been deemed a good thing because the world as we know it now would cease to operate on many levels if it was taken away. But it becomes a huge problem when addiction sets in. Spending too much time in front of a screen has been linked to a lack of sleep, speech delays, and poor social skills. But research out of the University of Michigan has found that the bigger issue “is whether screen use causes problems in other areas of life or has become an all-consuming activity,” says the study’s lead author Sarah Domoff, assistant professor of psychology at Central Michigan University. When this happens, it’s considered screen addiction. Signs that show that your kids have a screen addiction: Researchers developed a tool to measure screen addiction among kids ages: 4 to 11. Classic signs of addiction include things like an inability to stop using the substance or when the use of that substance begins to interfere with your life and relationships. When it comes to kids and screens, the symptoms aren’t all that different. Here are the red flags to watch for that suggest your kid might have a screen addiction. 1. Your child can’t control their screen use The researchers call this “unsuccessful control,” when kids have trouble stopping using devices. If you’ve tried to impose limits on screen time, but your kiddo just couldn’t deal, this could be an issue. 2. Loss of interest in other activities If “tablet time” is the only thing that motivates your child (books, toys, and sports don’t get them nearly as excited), they might be too invested in screen use. 3. It preoccupies their thoughts If even when your kid isn’t playing video games, he’s talking about Minecraft, wondering what his favorite YouTuber will post next, or be acting out scenes from Angry Birds, this could be a sign of addiction. 4. It interferes with socializing Is your child bringing a phone to the dinner table? Sneaking peeks at his tablet while his grandmother tries to make conversation? When screens interfere with family activities, they could be problematic. 5. Screen use causes serious family problems Have you had any blowout arguments incited by screen use? Or behaviors problems related to something they’re watching? This could be a sign of an unhealthy relationship with screens. 6. Your kid shows signs of withdrawal When it’s time to turn off the TV for bedtime or put mobile devices away for a screen-free family time and your kid gets frustrated, they may actually be experiencing withdrawal. 7. Their tolerance is increasing If your child used to watch 30 minutes of YouTube after school each day but now she’s even watching it on a phone on the way home from school, her tolerance is on the rise. 8. They’re deceptive about it If your kiddo is sneaking a tablet into bed at [...]

As a parent, you have great dreams for your kids. You dream that they’ll grow and be successful in whatever they do, be able to provide for themselves and their families and probably even take proper care of you when you’re grey and old. But then, you realize that your kid just dislikes studying and you just can’t understand why. Normally, most kids naturally would prefer doing other things to studying but when it comes to a point where your child actually “hates” studying, then something needs to be done. How do you handle such situations without making matters worse? Well, read on to learn more. Note: It is important to note that studying isn’t just about school. It has been scientifically proven that reading helps to shape your mind and helps you in other aspects of your life outside of school. What to do when your child hates studying: 1. Understand The Cause For Dislike Your first step should be to find out why the kid exactly your kid dislikes reading so much. Is it that the book not stimulating his brains or his senses? Is the child having difficulty remembering things learned in school? Is the kid absorbed with something else? Are the child's interests at loggerheads with the studies? With a carefully charted conversation, make sure you try your best to understand why your child does not like studies at all. Once you get to the root cause, creative solutions can be formulated to deal with the issue. 2. Plain Reading Is Boring The truth is that children in school are at their peak of creativity. They derive pleasure in imagining things and knit stories around them. So if you want to teach them to learn, don’t just sit there and force them to learn. You have to give wings to their imaginations. Try to make use of colorful pictures, videos, and presentation to teach them. 3. Interactive Study Is Good For Memory When it’s few weeks towards exams and your child has to memorize a lot, don't give them a sheet of questions to write the answers. They’ll just find that boring and sometimes even irritating. What you want to do is look for a more creative and interactive way to have them remember. Have a role play activity. Let your child be a celebrity and you interview him or her. Frame your question to mimic a real interview and let the child answer. This will ensure that the child has learned the chapters and it does not resemble a boring study routine. 4. Don The Role Of A Student From research conducted in schools, involving students and their teachers, it was found that children love to enact their teachers. So why not use that as an opportunity to have them learn more. You become the student and try to involve other family members in this imaginary classroom. Tell your child to be the teacher and teach you the lessons of the day. You ask a [...]

Inasmuch as it has been proven through research that kids that are not socially connected are more prone to isolation and depression, being connected to the wrong social group can be quite detrimental. Having bad friends can lead to risky decision-making, bad behaviors, and poor academic performance. However, finding good friends can be hard for teens who struggle socially, and falling into the wrong crowd is easy. Trying to pull a teen away from these potentially destructive relationships can be like trying to separate two powerful magnets. Once teens find peer acceptance, they don’t want to let it go. They will do whatever it takes to fit in, even if it means going against their parents' wishes. Funnily, in some cases, these teens seem to have nothing in common with their new friends, but desire something different. These teens will often abandon their good friends in search of new and exciting relationships. Adolescence and the tyranny of extremes can truly leave parents in a quandary about what to do next. Long gone are the childhood days of arranging play dates and orchestrating friendships. Teens, as opposed to young children, like to be in the driver's seat. But if the teen is a reckless driver, parents may be left frantically searching for ways to keep the teen on the straight and narrow path. So what's a parent to do? A lot of people would advise that in this case, it is best to let the teenager learn from his or her experience. But how long can a parent sit and just watch her child fade away slowly? So how do you take actions and at the same time not come off as an overbearing nanny to your kids? First, it's important to identify if there is a reason to be concerned about who your child is associating with. These are some signs your child may be hanging with the wrong crowd: 1. Suspicious behavior Teens who are up to no good usually sneak behind their parents' backs and behave suspiciously. 2. Tanking grades. Teens who get involved with the wrong crowd often begin to neglect academic responsibilities. Their homework assignments don’t get completed, projects don’t get turned in and they may arrive to class late or even skip classes. 3. Snarky attitude It's certainly not out of character for many teens to roll their eyes, sigh loudly or do other things to show when they're annoyed. But add a group of snarky teens to the mix, and the result can be a back-talking disrespectful tirade. 4. Avoiding interests and hobbies When teens hang out with peers who are a poor influence, they tend to withdraw from what they once enjoyed doing. They become more interested in impressing their new friends and doing the things their friends like instead. 5. Dissing old friends Teens who find a new peer group tend to neglect old friends in favor of the new and may jeopardize positive relationships. Of course, if you determine your teen [...]

Every parent’s dream is that one day their kids will grow up into responsible men and women and be able to get a good job to take care of themselves and their families. This looks plausible until your kids start failing in school. This can be frustrating and scary. After all, failed classes could mean a lower GPA, trouble getting into college, and perhaps even trouble to graduate from high school on time. When high school students fall behind in their classes, catching up can be quite difficult. When grades begin to plummet, many teens give up. If your teen is failing a class—or he's already failed the entire semester—take action. There are several things you can do to address the issue and we’ve taken out time to highlight them below. 1. Identify the Problem If your teen has a failing grade or is in danger of not passing, sit down and discuss the problem. Ask your teen for help uncovering the reasons he’s not passing. Sometimes students who start out strong get sidetracked while other students just aren’t motivated to stay on track. Have a chat with your teen and examine whether or not any of these issues have contributed to a failing grade. Make sure to find out the answers to the following questions: Are the classes too hard? Sometimes teens sign up for classes that are just too difficult and they become overwhelmed. Is your child not doing the homework? If your teen isn’t doing homework, it will be extremely difficult to pass a class. Find out if homework isn’t completed, not turned in on time, or if your child doesn’t understand how to do it. Are low test scores a problem? Some students struggle with test anxiety or aren’t sure how to study for tests. Has your child had a lot of absences? If your child has missed school due to illness or other issues, it can severely interfere with grades. Is your child under a lot of stress? If your teen is stressed out, he may have difficulty concentrating and completing his work. Could a mental health issue be part of the problem? Mental health problems, such as depression or anxiety often contribute to failing grades. Substance abuse issues can also be a factor in declining grades 2. Talk to the Teachers Although your teen may not want you to talk to the teachers, it’s important to speak with them to help determine the problem. Your teen may not be aware that he’s not paying attention in class or that he’s missing a lot of work. Ask for teachers’ opinions about what your child needs to do differently to pass the class. Consider whether your child may have a learning disability as well. Sometimes learning disabilities or ADHD go undiagnosed until the high school years. Inquire about whether or not educational or psychological testing could be helpful. 3. Problem-Solve with Your Teen After your research and you now have a better idea of why he [...]

The truth is that, as parents, when your kid is in the middle of a tantrum, it can be hard for you to keep yourself from having your own meltdown, as well. "Meltdowns are terrible, nasty things, but they're a fact of childhood," says Ray Levy, PhD, a Dallas-based clinical psychologist and co-author of Try and Make Me! Simple Strategies That Turn Off the Tantrums and Create Cooperation. "Young kids—namely those between the ages of 1 and 4—haven't developed good coping skills yet. They tend to just lose it instead." And what exactly sets them off to begin with? Every single tantrum, Levy says, results from one simple thing: not getting what they want. "For children between 1 and 2, tantrums often stem from trying to communicate a need—more milk, a diaper change, that toy over there—but not having the language skills to do it," says Levy. "They get frustrated when you don't respond to what they're 'saying' and throw a fit." For older toddlers, tantrums are more of a power struggle. "By the time kids are 3 or 4, they have grown more autonomous," Levy adds. "They're keenly aware of their needs and desires—and want to assert them more. If you don't comply? Tantrum city." So the big question here is: How can you stop these outbursts? No need to start brainstorming. We’ve got you covered. What follows are 7 freak-out fixes that both parenting experts and other moms swear by. Take time to read, and understand carefully, each one of them. 1. Take Steps to Prevent Tantrums Set aside regular playtime with your preschooler. Let him take the lead in choosing the activity, and give him your full attention. Having that shared positive experience will give your child a better foundation for calming himself down the next time he gets upset. Look for opportunities to point out his good behaviors, even the small ones. The more favorable attention he gets for the desired behavior, the more likely he is to do it again. You can also model healthy ways to handle frustration in the heat of the moment, such as taking deep breaths. Equally important, fess up after you lose your temper by saying something like, “Oh, Mom really overreacted.” Your child needs to see and hear that it’s okay to make a mistake sometimes. Finally, set your little one up for success. Be aware of situations that tend to end in a tantrum, and plan accordingly. If he loses it when his tummy’s rumbling, pack a healthy snack. If he throws a fit when overtired, make naptime a top priority. 2. Don’t Try to Calm Him Down This is one mistake that most parents make. Ignore him unless he is physically endangering himself or others. By taking away your attention completely, you won’t reinforce his undesirable behavior. Walk out of the room and set a timer for a few minutes to check on him. If your child starts hitting, kicking, biting, or throwing things during a meltdown, [...]